The Difference Between ‘Highest’ and ‘Only’

The Reflection

When I work with clients around self-love, we talk about the importance of making loving themselves their highest priority. Invariably they ask, “But isn’t loving myself selfish? What about everyone else in my life? What about my responsibilities?”

There’s a big difference between making yourself your highest priority and making yourself your only priority. It is indeed selfish to prioritize only your wants and needs in your relationships. But making yourself your highest priority is actually a generous position to take, because you will never be able to truly give to others when you act from a sense of obligation or sacrifice or just to “look good.”

When you make loving yourself your highest priority, you will come to every encounter already filled with love and know how to stay true to yourself along the way. You’ll share your love out of a genuine desire to be loving. There’s nothing selfish about that.

Let’s Practice

Make two lists:

  1. List 10 ways that prioritizing other things or people (over yourself) negatively impacts you.
  2. List 10 ways your life will improve when you make loving yourself your highest priority.